When we think of abuse, it’s often physical violence that comes to mind. But abuse can take many forms – some are visible, but others are harder to see, hidden in everyday behaviours and relationships.

It can look like someone controlling finances, isolating a loved one from friends and family, or misusing digital tools to monitor and intimidate.

Abuse can happen to anyone, in any relationship, and its impact often lingers long after the harm is done – leaving emotional wounds that are just as real as physical ones.

In this article, we’ll explore the many forms abuse can take and why it’s so important to recognise and address each one.

What is abuse?

At its core, abuse is about power and control. It can take many forms, from physical harm to behaviours that intimidate, manipulate or isolate someone. Abuse often happens in relationships where there’s an imbalance of power – between partners, family members, or caregivers and those in their care.

While physical violence is often the most visible form, abuse can also be hidden in actions that degrade, exploit or erode someone’s sense of safety and independence.

Recognising the many types of abuse is the first step in understanding its impact and ensuring those affected get the support they need.

Types of abuse

Emotional abuse

Emotional abuse, sometimes called psychological abuse or coercive control (more on that below), can be harder to see but leaves lasting wounds. It’s made up of behaviours that chip away at a person’s confidence, independence, and sense of self-worth. Even without visible signs, the impact can be profound, leading to feelings of anxiety, depression and isolation.

Some common signs of emotional abuse include:

• Constant criticism or belittling.
• Gaslighting (making someone question their own thoughts or reality).
• Isolating someone from their friends, family or support networks.
• Using threats or intimidation to instill fear.

Once behaviour often seen in emotional abuse is love bombing. At first, it can seem like overwhelming affection – lavish gifts, endless compliments, or attention that feels all-consuming. But this is often a way for an abuser to create dependency and gain control, becoming the first step in a cycle of manipulation.

Coercive control

Coercive control is a particularly harmful and insidious form of emotional abuse. It isn’t always easy to spot because it often unfolds gradually, as a pattern of behaviours designed to dominate, isolate and wear down a victim’s sense of autonomy and self-worth.

Unlike more visible forms of abuse, coercive control can feel like a constant, invisible weight – an ongoing campaign of manipulation that leaves the victim feeling trapped and powerless.

Some examples of coercive control include:

• Tracking where someone is, who they’re with or how they spend their time.
• Cutting someone off from friends, family or any source of outside help.
• Restricting access to phones, social media or transportation.
• Creating fear to maintain control, whether through words, actions or implied harm.

Coercive control often happens behind closed doors, making it harder to identify and understand. Yet it’s increasingly recognised as a significant red flag for escalating abuse, including physical violence. In Queensland, coercive control is now formally recognised in legislation as a precursor to more overt forms of domestic abuse – an important step towards addressing this devastating issue.

Digital abuse

In today’s connected world, technology can be a lifeline for many – but for those experiencing abuse, it can also become a tool for harm and control. Digital abuse happens when technology is weaponised to monitor, harass, intimidate or isolate someone. While it may not leave visible scars, the emotional impact can be devastating and long-lasting.

Some examples of digital abuse include:

• Tracking someone's location without their permission, often through phones or apps.
• Demanding access to passwords for email, banking or social media accounts as a way to monitor or control.
• Sending abusive or threatening messages, including texts, emails or direct messages
• Sharing intimate images or videos without consent (also commonly known as revenge porn).
• Using technology to stalk or harass, such as constant calls, monitoring social media activity or impersonating someone online.

Digital abuse can be subtle at first – like a partner checking your phone “just to make sure you’re okay” – but it can escalate into a pattern of control that leaves victims feeling trapped or isolated. In some cases, it overlaps with over forms of abuse, such as emotional or coercive control. For example, excessive texting or online messaging might initially feel like love bombing – showering someone with attention to create dependency – but it can quickly turn into a way to monitor and manipulate.

As our lives become increasingly digital, it’s important to recognise the signs of this form of abuse and understand that no one has the right to control or invade your online or personal space.

Financial abuse

Financial abuse, also known as economic abuse, is a subtle yet deeply damaging form of control that often leaves victims feeling powerless and trapped. It occurs when someone manipulates or limits another person’s access to money or financial resources as a way to control their independence and choices. While it’s often a key part of coercive control in relationships, financial abuse can happen in families, friendships or caregiver situations, too.

For victims, this form of abuse isn’t just an impact on their wallet – it can make leaving an abusive relationship feel impossible, especially when there’s no money to fall back on.

Some examples of financial abuse include:

• Forbidding someone from working or forcing them to quit their job.
• Controlling access to bank accounts or withholding money for essential needs like food or healthcare.
• Taking out loans, credit cards or debts in someone else’s name without their knowledge or consent.
• Monitoring or restricting spending, often demanding receipts or using it as a way to criticise and humiliate.
• Sabotaging employment by causing disruptions at work or hiding transportation.

Financial abuse is a devastating cycle – victims may lose their financial independence, confidence and stability, leaving them reliant on their abuser. This is especially true for women who may already face systemic financial inequality, like lower lifetime earnings or disrupted careers due to caregiving.

But rebuilding your financial independence is possible, and you don’t have to do it alone. Explore our article on how women rebuild financial stability after abusive relationships for practical advice on taking those first steps.

Verbal abuse

Verbal abuse might not leave visible marks, but its impact can cut deep. This form of abuse uses words as weapons to intimate, manipulate or tear down someone’s confidence. It often creeps in gradually, leaving victims questioning their self-worth, second-guessing themselves and feeling trapped in a cycle of shame and fear.

Verbal abuse can happen anywhere – behind closed doors, in public or even over text or calls. Whether it’s constant criticism or hurtful remarks disguised as “jokes”, its effects are very real.

Common signs of verbal abuse include:

• Frequent yelling, insults, or threats that leave someone feeling afraid or worthless.
• Mocking or humiliating someone in front of others to undermine their confidence.
• Blaming the victim for the abuser’s behavior, turning their actions into the victim's responsibility.

Verbal abuse often works hand-in-hand with other forms of abuse, such as emotional or coercive control. Over time, it can chip away at a person’s mental and emotional well-being, leading to anxiety, depression and a diminished sense of self.

If you’re unsure about what’s happening to you, the red flags of domestic abuse can help you identify patterns of abusive behavior and guide you towards support.

Physical abuse

Physical abuse is one of the most visible and recognised forms of abuse, but it’s rarely an isolated issue. It often exists alongside the aforementioned types of abuse, creating a dangerous and overwhelming cycle of control.

This type of abuse involves intentional acts of violence designed to harm, intimidate or assert power over someone. For those experiencing physical abuse, the fear of being hurt again can be just as debilitating as the violence itself.

Examples of physical abuse include:

• Slapping, punching, or kicking – using physical force to hurt or intimidate.
• Choking or strangulation, or using objects as weapons.
• Denying medical attention after an injury, preventing someone from getting the care they need.

However, physical abuse doesn’t always leave visible bruises or scars. It can also involve pushing, shoving or threats of violence that create constant fear and a sense of helplessness. For many, the emotional impact of living in this state – feeling unsafe, powerless and isolated – can be just as damaging as the physical harm itself.

Sexual abuse

Sexual abuse refers to any unwanted or non-consensual sexual activity. It can take many forms, ranging from harassment and coercion to assault and rape, and it can happen in any environment – within relationships, families, workplaces or social settings. Sexual abuse is about power and control, leaving survivors feeling violated, unsafe and often isolated.

Examples of sexual abuse include:

• Forcing sexual acts without consent.
• Coercing someone into sexual activity through threats, pressure or manipulation.
• Exploiting someone sexually, such as sharing intimate photos without their consent (sometimes called revenge porn).

Sexual abuse can occur even within trusted relationships, which can make it especially difficult for survivors to come forward. This includes situations where someone feels pressure to “give in” to unwanted advances to avoid conflict or harm. For survivors, the impacts can be long-lasting, affecting mental health, self-worth and trust in others.

Neglect

Neglect happens when someone fails to provide the basic care, support or protection that a dependent individual needs to thrive. It often impacts those who are most vulnerable, including:

• Children
• Older adults
• Individuals with disabilities

Neglect can take many forms – withholding food, medical care, hygiene, or emotional support – and it can leave lasting harm. While it may not involve direct violence, neglect can have devastating physical and psychological effects, leading to malnutrition, illness, feelings of abandonment and lasting emotional trauma.

In children, neglect can impact development, education and long-term wellbeing. For older adults or individuals with disabilities, neglect may leave them isolated, vulnerable and unable to advocate for themselves.

Recognising neglect can be challenging, as it often happens behind closed doors. Understanding the signs and offering support can make all the difference for someone who feel unseen and unheard.

Vulnerable populations and abuse

Certain groups in our community are particularly vulnerable to abuse, often facing additional barriers to safety, support and justice.

Children and young people

Children are among the most vulnerable to abuse, which can take many forms:

• Physical abuse
• Sexual abuse
• Emotional abuse
• Neglect

In Queensland, the Child Protection Act 1999 focuses on whether a child has experienced – or is at risk of – significant harm. Recent amendments, effective from 21 May 2023, reinforce children's rights, amplify their voices in decisions that impact them, and enhance support for First Nations children and families.

The Act recognises the profound and lasting impacts abuse can have on education, relationships, mental health and a child’s ability to thrive well into adulthood.

Older adults

Elder abuse is a growing concern, with older women disproportionately affected. It often occurs within relationships of trust, which can make it particularly difficult to identify or report.

Common forms of elder abuse include:

• Financial exploitation (e.g., misuse of funds or assets)
• Emotional or psychological abuse
• Physical harm or neglect

Fear of losing independence, shame or dependence on the abuser can leave older adults feeling trapped and unheard. Raising awareness and encouraging open conversations is key to addressing elder abuse and ensuring older adults feel safe and supported.

Individuals with impaired decision-making capacity

Adults who face challenges with decision-making – such as individuals with disabilities or cognitive impairments – are also at higher risk of abuse. This can include:

• Exploiting vulnerabilities, taking advantage of someone’s circumstances
• Neglecting to provide the essential care or support someone needs
• Coercing or pressuring someone into activities or decisions they don't want to make, stripping them of their choice and autonomy

In Queensland, the Office of the Public Guardian plays a key role in protecting these individuals. It investigates allegations of abuse, neglect or exploitation and advocates for their rights and wellbeing.

Understanding who is most vulnerable to abuse – and how it manifests – helps us better protect those at risk.

If you or someone you know needs help, call 1800 RESPECT or visit The Handy Guide service directory for resources, emergency contacts and practical advice.